{"id":107,"date":"2022-04-05T17:55:25","date_gmt":"2022-04-05T21:55:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.temple.edu\/lunarlitmag\/?p=107"},"modified":"2022-04-05T18:06:58","modified_gmt":"2022-04-05T22:06:58","slug":"a-permission-slip","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sites.temple.edu\/lunarjournal\/2022\/04\/05\/a-permission-slip\/","title":{"rendered":"a permission slip"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

a permission slip<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

by Anonymous Writer<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

it whispered when, on fresh slate of a new state,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i sat on the carpet, pretzeled and peaceful and unkempt,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

halloween socks in summertime,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and ate an apple. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

it winked at me while i was alone<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in my childhood bathroom, the sink handles hyperreal,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

as i snapped into realization that<\/p>\n\n\n\n

my attempts to control how the world sees me is like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

trying to rinse butter off a knife with cold water.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

there was the permission slip of strangers who sublimated into friends<\/p>\n\n\n\n

tumbling proud bodies into lake michigan, unshaven, unjudged. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

wide-eyed little-me whispered that\u2019s allowed? <\/em>and a chorus sung yes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it smiled during my interpretive dance to silence<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in my kitchen, my brain lit with color.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

all i could say was \u201ci\u2019m grover\u201d and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i laughed about how good it felt until the joy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

spilled over and out of my eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

fuck being on a scale from a man to woman!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i can listen and show up as the person<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i wish little-me could meet. i hear <\/p>\n\n\n\n

a minecraft and dinosaur kid, a witch-cowboy, <\/p>\n\n\n\n

soot balls holding stars, or sometimes a calm quiet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i can perform as a girl when i\u2019m drunk in a bar bathroom,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

slow dance with womanhood when we workshop poems about misogyny,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

then i wink in the mirror alone at home<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and detach.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

here\u2019s the memo i missed: you can have fun<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and if you aren\u2019t, go look.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(certainty doesn\u2019t precede joy.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

i was waiting for the world to spin and shake and spit out a slip of paper<\/p>\n\n\n\n

saying my gender and pronouns. but we\u2019re each our world. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

and we\u2019ll never be here again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

shake and spin and see.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

get some sun on your face. you deserve the joy of recognizing yourself.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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