well that was anti-climatic

I don’t mind leaving with nothing

I don’t mind making a fool of myself

I don’t mind being torn up again

I don’t mind seeing what I’ve become

although,

I mind that I had to break my own rose-colored glasses

I mind that I took it out on you

I mind that I made others clean it up

I mind that this is all my fucking fault

and,

I mind that… in the end, I don’t

what I look like irl

the last letter

There will be no more after this. Out of sight but never out of mind, I already saw glimmers of you in my imagination but I know I can not do this again. I made it to the end of the road and will not go back, for the sake of us both. There’s so much pain surrounding the idea of loss, of giving up, and although the situation has brought neither of these things why does it seem so similar?
Because your smile has touched my every word, your gentleness has held my every hope, since that day. The effect is no longer the same so I can not hang on, but how sad it seems to move on from such happiness. I know I will miss it. So much I created because of you, and here it comes to an end. One day we may return to this, you may say things I actually hear, I may write letters you actually read, and we can enjoy this together instead of apart.
But until then, I let you go. And I’m only able to do this because I love you so much. Thank you for understanding, and for everything.

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